Do you want to help your children grow in their relationship with God and encourage them in their walk with Christ but struggle with how to do it?

I believe with all my heart that the ones primarily responsible for the spiritual growth and nurture of children are their parents. I know that many children do not have parents who care if they find a relationship with God, and I have worked with countless Christ-followers who have heard God’s call and have filled this gap through children’s ministries, Sunday schools, etc. But for Christian parents, these ministries should supplement, not replace the role God has given them.

The Barna Research Group reported,

“Parents believe that they are primarily responsible for the spiritual development of their children, but few parents spend time during a typical week interacting with their children on spiritual matters”

When my children were young, I tried to have a weekly family worship night. All I knew to do was to follow the model of Bible study I was familiar with, and I did a lot of lecturing. I’ll have to admit that those nights were pretty rough. I kept thinking, “There must be a simple way for us to spend time with our children each week and lead them to worship, hear God’s voice, and develop obedience-based discipleship?”

I wish that I knew then what I have finally learned about discovery Bible studies.

Family Bible Discovery Time

There is a simple way to set aside a time to interact intentionally with your children around God’s Word. Let me share an option with you that moves in four directions, which involves asking discovery questions. According to Garry Poole in his book The Complete Book of Questions: 1001 Conversation Starters for Any Occasion,

“There is something powerful about questions that force you to think, look within yourself, examine your heart, and search for answers. And it’s in the process of responding to those questions that you often make discoveries about yourself — things you never even realized before.”

Discovery questions allow us to find wonderful treasures about one another and about God from His Word. Parents, please don’t do all the talking. Ask questions, and take the time to listen. Don’t be afraid of silence or long pauses. Teach your family to listen and discover what God has to say through the Bible and through one another.

Four Directions of a Family Bible Discovery Time

Choose a time that is appropriate for your family. (By the way, this plan can be used by couples without children)

1. Link together as a family.

The direction of this segment focuses on Me to You.

• Consider starting with a meal at the table.
• Conduct your Family Discovery Time at the table or move to the family room.
• Begin with a fun question that everyone can answer.
  • This question will pull everyone’s attention to a focal point.
  • Use a question that will reveal something about you to your children and also will reveal something about your children to you.
  • Ask questions like, “If you had to live on a deserted island and only eat one kind of pizza for the rest of your life, what would it be. (see 49 Family Conversation Questions)

2. Love the Lord your God

This is a time of worship, and the direction is Us to God.

• Involve your children in choosing the medium.
• Select an online music video that would be meaningful. (always watch it before using to ensure that any images are appropriate for your family)
• Listen to and sing with recorded music.
• If someone in your family plays an instrument, find ways to use it in worship.
• Be creative and find ways to worship without music. You might read a Psalm or other scripture passage and pray.
• Here are two great questions that focus on the Lord’s provision and can be followed with prayer.
  • What are you thankful for today?
  • What is stressing you out today?
• Pray and acknowledge the Lord’s presence.

3. Listen to what Spirit says through reading the Bible

It is time to change directions and focus on God to Us.

• Choose a short passage of scripture and facilitate a listening time.
• Read the passage slowly three times and pause to reflect and think between each reading. A parent can read it first, followed by other family members.
• After the third reading ask discovery questions.
  • What stands out to you in this passage?
  • What are some treasures that you discovered?
  • Is there anything you did not understand that you need to research further?
  • What does this passage tell us about God?
  • What does this passage tell us about people?
• Trust the Holy Spirit to be your teacher and direct the conversation. If you simply read God’s Word together and ask questions, God’s Spirit will speak to you in your heart and through what He says to other family members.

4. Look to see where the Father is working

The direction here is still God to Us, but now it’s getting personal.

• Ask questions that led to obedience and transformation.
  • What do you need to do to be obedient to what you discovered in this passage?

5. Leave to be on mission with Christ

The fourth direction moves us outward and is God through Us.

• Ask leaving questions.
  • Who do you know who needs to hear what you discovered in this passage?
  • How can you tell them about the Good News you discovered?
  • Is there anyone who has any needs that you are concerned about?
  • Is there something specific we do to show God’s love for them?
• Pray for any people and needs discovered and pray for obedience that you might look more like Jesus.
• Go practice the five Ls – Look, Link, Listen, Love, and Leave.

Note for when you meet next

When you meet next week, ask some accountability questions during the linking time.

• Do you have any stories to tell about how you were obedient to what you discovered last week or someone you were able to share with about the Good News you discovered?

Missional Challenge

1. Choose a time to begin your family discovery time.
2. Start simple and keep it simple.
3. Listen!

Grace and peace to you on your missional journey